It has been a couple of weeks since my last post and sorry and ecstatic to say that everything has been pretty much normal. Band camp was more challenge than I expected it to be both professionally and personally. Little man was supposed to stay with my parents the first week and then my parents were supposed to come up here and help with my house and stay here for the second week. Well my mom threw out her back and they had to bring my boy back and I was alone for the second week. I was terrified because of the long crazy hours and trying to find what to do with him during the evening hours, etc.... However, we did it without a hitch! It worked fine because I have some awesome friends and some really great band parents who really were there for me.
This made me realize more than ever that I can do this. I may get a little crazy and my patience gets tested because the little guy is a stubborn as his father and when he gets something in his head it won't leave until he is satisfied but, we are doing ok.
On the professional side; everything that I feared about not writing the show has come to pass. The parts are lame, he didn't get us one note during band camp,and I don't really care. I know that I should be up in arms and I should be angry and I tried to be but, I was reminded very quickly of my ranking in opinion and  process. Now I don't care if the drums learn the whole show before Christmas. I will teach it to them when it gets here, I will make it as good as I can, and I won't complain about it. I will not however retry and fix the problem when it comes up again, rewrite a single note, put one single once of my own creativity into it, or make chicken salad out of it at all. Also, frankly, I don't think I should be expected to either.

My personal life has taken a positive turn. WE have signed the prerequisite papers and it is now on its way to being officially done. Also I found out I have been approved for my loan modification. Two big steps on my way to a normal existence!! I have also started to try and become a semi vegetarian and quit drinking sodas. Another two big steps added on to my having not had a cigarette in two months. I am really proud of myself for all of these accomplishments both professionally and personally. They show a level of persistence I had lost and now I am starting to like have ing control again. So people better watch out. Passive is gone.